This one is for St. Patrick's Day
An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick's Catholic Church. 
 
'Father', he confessed, 'it has been one month since my last 
confession. I had sex with Nookie Green twice last month.' 
 
The priest told the sinner, 'You are forgiven. Go out and say three 
Hail Mary's.' 
 
Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered 
the confessional. 'Father, 
it has been two months since my last confession. I've had sex with 
Nookie Green twice a week for the past two months.' 
 
This time, the priest questioned, 'Who is this Nookie Green?' 
 
'A new woman in the neighborhood ,' the sinner replied. 
 
'Very well,' sighed the priest. Go and say ten Hail Mary's .;&nbs p;
 
At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon, 
a tall, voluptuous, drop -dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary. 
The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly 
sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. Her 
dress was green and very short, and she wore matching, shiny 
emerald-green shoes. 
 
The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and 
matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but 
enough. 
 
The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered, 'Is that Nookie 
Green?' 
 
The bug-eyed altar boy couldn't believe his ears but managed to calmly 
reply, 'No Father, I think it's just a reflection from her shoes'